Now it is time to rethink the whole schedule!!

Well this semester has been difficult to say the least. It feels like I am juggling more than ever but only getting mediocrity. So, in the last two weeks I have had test in both lecture classes and lab classes. The results where only average I got a A, a B and 2 C's. That is just unacceptable!! Well the A of course is OK but I am at least a straight B student. My major problem is lack of study time. Since I have had the baby my ability to stay up and study at night is gone. I just cannot keep my eyes open. I will be reading and the next thing I know my head is bobbing. Ugg, it is so frustrating. And because school starts so early for the little angel, we all have to get up earlier. So there is no extra time in the morning. Plus if I get up and out of the bed and the little guy wakes up and sees me out of bed, he is awake. So the dilemma is when to study. The days are full of classes for me and the kids. The evenings just fly by. I hate to have to leave the house any more than I have to. I really need to get a part time job but my schedule is pretty full.

The solution- I have started making the kids go to bed at 8:30. They do not have to go to sleep but they do have to read for a little bit. Then they can play quietly till lights out. This helps me start home work earlier. So far it is great!! But I will continue to modify our schedule until it is functional, productive and supportive of a happy house hold.

What is new......lots!!

The last year has been evolutionary. We began last year same as always. But then in April Scot lost his job. The next week we found out that I was pregnant. So I spent the summer with morning sickness. It was terrible morning sickness, too. I have been planning on applying pharmacy school but it keeps getting pushed back. It is so frustrating!! For a few years Scot has complained of neck pain. Last, March he was in a car wreck and had a neck injury. We settled with the insurance company and went on. We were broke b/c of the layoff. His neck was causing him so much pain. I knew it was bad when he said that it was hurting worse than his back!! His back hurts so much I don't know how he has functioned for the last few years. So this year he had surgery the first of August. It turned out that his neck pain was from two herniated discs. Well, he has several herniated discs but the doctor felt that the two he removed were the main trouble makers. Since then he said the migraine type pain that wrapped around his head was better. I guess he has had a little relief. Last week though he has had pain and burning in the lower part of his head which is associated with neck injuries. Because he is in such .... Oh wait, he also needs ankle surgery from an old injury. It has been hurting alot, too. But due to the large amounts of pain he is in daily we are going to file for disability. He just cannot go back to work. The most frustrating part is that his pain is so out of control. I wish there were more pain med. options or other treatments. He just suffers so much.

Needless to say we knew this day was coming. His back has been bad for along time. But I am just not prepared to be the bread winner just yet. I am still in school and will be for quite a while. I have 3 kids that I home school. I have an amazing little guy who needs a mom. I am feeling frustrated, scared and sad. Sad to loose my time with the kids. I love being with them. Each one is fun and amazing in their own way. They are the best!!! I am not sure where to go from this point. I should be looking for a job but how?? Between the kids school, my school and the baby. I am booked.

It is hard to write and catch up in just one post. I will try to keep a little more active. Hope all is good where you are!!

The rock in the road

My darling daughter was reading a story about a king who had placed a rock in the road where his country men and women traveled. He watched and waited for someone to move the bothersome rock. It was quite large and hindered the travels of the towns people. The rock was left there for three weeks. No one tried to move it. The towns people blamed each other for not moving the rock. The king came and had his servants move the rock and beneath it lay a box containing a ring and twenty gold coins.

This, for some reason, got me thinking of my own life. Am I dodging the boulders that are placed in my path? Should I be looking for ways to remove them and find the treasures that await? My path has felt like a continuous mound of boulders. Some are immovable while others I am able to pick up and toss aside. But some of these rocks are so sharp and treacherous that I find myself asking is it worth the bumps and bruises?? I am not sure.

But what I have found is that the journey when accompanied by my family is not unpleasant. In fact, it is quite joyful.

New Year, New Stuff

Wow, it has been almost a year since my last post. Time goes so fast. I am still busy with school and the kids. I have been working at a local department store since Thanksgiving. I really enjoy working there. My classes start on Monday. I will be in class three days a week this semester. I have been homeschooling 4 of my 5 kids this year. Which is a ton of work. We have been using K12 and it is a full load of work for all of my little people.

I got P90X for my birthday last year. I did it a few times last year but this year I have been consistently doing it every other day. It works your booty off!! I love it!! I am excited to see the results in just a short amount of time. Woo Hoo!!!

Wordful Wednesday

Chocolate, does Wordful Wednesdays so I thought I'd join in.

Wish upon a star...as a child I remember often wishing for things I did not have. I wished on dandelion flowers, shooting stars, wishbones from turkeys and sometimes just because. Most of the time the wish did not come true. Was I disappointed? No...not really. I guess I was raised to believe that wishes are not magic but that blessings are. I remember wishing for things and then praying for them. Some prayers would be answered the way that I wanted but others were left silent. I was always grateful for the blessings not the wishes.

As an adult I still wish, only now it is different. I wish for things and my analytical mind takes over and comprises plans to accomplish the wish. Maybe a wish is not a wish but a dream. It gives us a glimmer of hope which may cause us to make changes in out lives to attain the wishful dream.

I am grateful that my wishes were not granted. As an adult I am happy, as a child I think I would have been thrilled. But now having a different perspective on life and the paths we choose and the roads we take. I am glad that I did not miss the journey that has made my wish or dream come true. I am happy to have had disappointment because it made the reward that much sweeter. I still make wishes that turn in to dreams. But I don't expect them to come true unless I am willing to work for them. That is kind of sad...maybe I have lost all the magic.?!

New Year

So it is a whole new year. I am guilty of making new years resolutions. I try to set the bar pretty low so I have a chance at succeeding.

My goals last year:

Read the scriptures as a family 5 nights a week - Success!!

Have family prayer in the morning. We do bedtime prayers all the time but the mornings with everyone going to school were a struggle - Struggled but 75% Success!

Be a better friend - Attempted but failed.

Being a good friend takes time and effort. I am sorry to say this but my time is over booked. I try to follow the council directed to us to eliminate activities that are not vital. But with the homeschooling(which is going pretty well), my school, being a mom and wife and taking care of the house I am left with very little free time.

This years resolutions:

Contact my friends by email or phone, once every 2 months.

Eliminate two non vital activities from my schedule.

Regular Family Home Evenings once a week.

I know my lists are not very impressive but they are small steps to a better me.

Things, they are a changin'

A couple of weeks ago I posted about difficulties I was having with many areas of my life. I am happy to say that many have been resolved. I had to change every plan that I had made for this semester. I changed my class schedule to a lighter load. I have two children in public school and homeschooling two. I have not homeschooled before but I am excited about the possibilities. I still am volunteering with the PTA. I am still first counselor in the Primary. I still do parties for lia sophia, once a week. So things are finally calming down. It was difficult to get to this point but I am grateful for every blessing that directed my footsteps!